The essay I have reviewed is titled “unnecessary brutality” by Antwyon Jackson.
- Organization
When I start reading the essay, the first thing that I was asked to review was the organization of the article that was inappropriate. The author didn’t introduce the topic like what unnecessary brutality is and why he is discussing this topic directly start from the event/example. The essay is not organized in the standard format.
- Introduction
There is no introduction paragraph, body paragraphs, and conclusion. There are only three paragraphs of the essay and haphazardly stuffed with the information. Even after reading the complete article two times, I didn’t understand the link between the topic and the information presented in the essay. As there is no introduction paragraph; thus, I am unable to interpret whether the author has provided appropriate suggestions of not.
- Body
First of all, there is no thesis statement in the essay. Thus the author does not logically connect his ideas into the paper from introduction to the body. In a standard essay format, there should be three body paragraphs, but the essay does not follow the standard essay format. In the first paragraph, the author is talking about American cops, and in the second paragraph, he starts talking about slavery and discrimination. Again in the second paragraph author does not connect his claims with the presented title of the essay. He didn’t introduce why and how he is talking about unnecessary brutality. The writer uses direct quotes but does not use statistical evidence to support his claim in the essay.
- Conclusion
There are no conclusion paragraphs in the essay. The author does not sum up the information, and the paper also lacks recommendations and suggestions for future researches. He didn’t conclude results and information presented into the body of the article.
- Style
One of the biggest weakness of this essay is that author do not cite information. There are no in-text citations, nor there make any reference list at the end of the paper. He did not cite summarized nor direct quotes into the paper. The grammar of the article is proper, but it lacks sentence making at some parts of the essay.
- Overall
Overall the essay needs many improvements. The author needs to take the following three most important steps for the completion of his draft;
- Format your paper (There must be five paragraphs, one introduction, three body, and one conclusion paragraph)
- Add thesis statement
- Cite all information, whether direct quotes or paraphrased information.