Communication Training
Communication is an important life skill as one is able to portray what they want and how they feel through communication. It is a major wheel turner in society with most areas needing communication to happen either between the employer and employees, between employees themselves and most importantly between the employees and the customers. In order for one to effectively communicate one has to know what he/she wants to say or do. Communication can be in different forms and not only verbal communication. It is important to read the non-verbal cues together with the verbal communication to effectively arrive at what exactly is going on. This said, most companies and organizations put a lot of value in communication and hence there are communication training that happen to not only teach the involved parties how to communicate but also boost the way in which they currently communicate.
In the Notebook 1 which compared interactions in different platforms; In answering the question of how much time it took for the exchange, each exchange roughly took 10 minutes to talk about and using the video chat or phone call the questions were well answered expending a lot of energy and excitement. (Bevan, J. L. 2013) The email was answered in all caps which is to relay a lot of excitement. In the video chat or phone call, I felt close to the person in the conversation as I could see the reaction and the energy matched my own and a lot of excitement surrounded it. I felt that using the email conveyed the same level of excitement. The interaction that was most satisfying was the one via phone call as I can be able to hear people’s voice which would create the illusion that you are together which is all dependent on the level of energy. Bevan observes on the importance of feedback in communication and should be taken into account while communicating.
In Notebook 2, My experiment is standing in the wrong direction, facing someone, or sit down while in an elevator or while in a queue at the store. Waving to everyone as you walk down a busy street is another instance of my experiment and shaking the hands of a lot of people while greeting them in the morning. The norms that are usually followed while in an elevator or bus or line are that you have to look straight ahead and not interact with the people. However, the values and beliefs that some people are brought up on are that speaking to people while in line shows that one has social skills and the respect that is given to the others. I was raised on such values and beliefs.
This experiment impacts on elements of nonverbal communication that are addressed in Bevan. One of these elements include proxemics. Proxemics refers to study of the usefulness of human space and effects of it to the population’s social interaction. Proxemics is a huge thing for most people as it is established in society that as one either walks down the street, or is in line at the store or is on the bus that there is the space that one is entitled to. This human space more often referred as personal space is the immediate space that surrounds a human being. This space is sacred to most and intruding into such spaces is seen as harassment. The experiment is able to lay out what happens in the society on a day to day basis and the need for proxemics in communication. Engaging someone at the store is in most cases dependent on their stance and how receptive they are to any kind of verbal communication. Someone crossing their arms and keeping a stone cold face could be perceived as not wanting any kind of talking to happen. Proxemics helps maintain this as one getting all up your personal space is frowned upon. Bevan highlights this element in detail in her book which is very useful.
I have been trained to obey nonverbal norms that I usually follow by my parents. They have always taught us that it is good to be respectful and that communicating with people be it a head nod or wave is core to our day to day living. Communication acknowledges someone and makes them feel noticed and respected.
In the Notebook 3, The last time that someone provided social support to me was when I was going through a tough time in my relationship and my sister was able to help me through my problems. While the last time that I assisted someone with social support was yesterday at work when a sailor needed help with making friends because he felt that friends were important in someone’s life. He could not get most things done because of this problem and felt so alone. I used action-facilitating and emotional support to this sailor which felt like appropriate options as seen from the circumstances. As per Bevan, verbal cues go together with nonverbal cues hence, the verbal and nonverbal cues that were used when giving support were nonverbal (crying, laughing, hugging and shaking hands) while the verbal cues were mostly talking through the issues and trying to identify the problem.
In the week 5 exercise instructions option 3 on whether I am a chameleon. I was able to put myself in a challenging position at work. There is a clear line between the boss and the employees and I challenged this position by talking to the boss about pertinent issues that affected us in the office. This is out of the ordinary as normal course of action would be to write an email and state the displeasure if any and any solution or comment towards the same. I am a naturally introverted person and I was able to step out of my comfort zone and speak to my Boss on the broken machines in the office that need to be fixed and how difficult such situations make an employee frustrated while doing their job.
Speaking to my Boss required me to first gage his mood as one is more receptive to criticisms if they are in a good mood. I then had to come up with what to say before the interaction as it would help me tread lightly and not step on anyone’s toes or feelings while relaying the problem. This helps to better understand how to navigate such a conversation which makes communicating even better and more effective. Emotional intelligence should be nurtured and used as it is this knowledge that one uses when broaching certain topics and knowing when to drop other topics. Empathy works in the same way as one needs to put themselves in another person’s shoes before going all out on them. In this case, before approaching my boss I thought out the situation and what I would do if I were the boss and after realizing the possibility of there being a solution to the problem, I was then able to confidently approach my Boss and lay the issue on the table. The interaction went better than I expected as my Boss stated that he knew the problem and was working towards fixing the problem. I felt that I was close to being a chameleon because I was able to change the communication style from being a written communication to one that was a verbal communication. In this instance, the verbal communication was preferred because one is able to get feedback instantly as compared to written communication where one sends an email which might take days before the recipient reads the email and responds to it accordingly. Bevan stated the chameleon effect in communication and its advantage where you are able to change your usual style of communication or the normal style of communication to fit the scenario in place.
My findings for the four exercise are that communication is a key ingredient in our day to day life and that people communicate in different ways. Communication is not only verbal but also non-verbal and in order to better understand what one is saying you need to study their body language and what they are saying. Communication brings people together and helps them better understand the thoughts and workings of others. It is important to communicate effectively to another person be it your employer or significant other. This not only boosts the relationship between the two but also any problem that arises is able to be solved with little to no misunderstandings.
In Notebook one, effective communication is necessary for one to communicate. This is seen through the excited responses that are share and the reciprocated energy in the emails and phone calls. A person effectively communicates when he/she clearly states what they want or need and the other is able to understand. It will be said that effective communication happened. One relayed information to the other who attentively deciphered the information and was able to respond in kind. This is the norm in texting or even phone calls but we have cases where effective communication fails to happen due to one thing or the other.
In Notebook 2, the experiment was to show what happens while communicating in the society. There are cultural norms that are ingrained by the people in the society and getting to effectively communicate with someone beyond these norms will in some cases be seen as a breach of culture. However, effective communication needs to happen despite the norms in place and this goes down to an individual. One needs to be able to respect the personal space of someone but can strike a conversation with them while in line at a store. This is done through verbal and non- verbal cues which should be studied for the same to happen.
In Notebook 3, we all need social support from time to time. This social support is what makes one have the energy to get through the day and overcome whichever problem lands their way. Social support will only become effective once it is communicated effectively. How can this be done? This happens when words are used where you talk to someone about your problem and in most instances words are seldom used alone hence the need for non-verbal cues which is basically communicating through your actions.
In the 4th exercise, the need for articulation shines through as in order for one to communicate effectively then it is important to state your words clearly for the other party to understand and respond in kind. This is one of the basic principles of effective communication which is the principle of clarity in the ideas that are presented. I was able to show clarity in ideas present to my Boss on the issues that affected us as the employees which was internalized by the Boss and responded with a solution which I was able to understand hence, effective communication took place. Going to the normal principles of effective communication which are on the language used, consistency, use of proper medium among other principles then effective communication happened in this 4th scenario. It is important as a person to develop good or effective communication skills in life as it will not only help you in the workplace but also in life generally i.e. in the store getting stuff or in instances when you need to be heard for something like in meetings and the likes.
All this exercises are on different scenarios of how people communicate with the most common being the first notebook which is basically the normal conversations that friends and family have. There have been million dollar investments on platforms that improve communication with there being apps where one can chat or text with a person of their choice to their being video call apps where one can not only talk to the other person(s) but also see them while at it. Communication is a key process in life and hence the need for effective platforms to promote effective communication. (Gamble, T. K., & Gamble, M. 2016).
People communicate in different ways at different times and Bevan was able to capture this in the book as observations of how human beings behave in society and communicate with one another. There is also the discussion on jealousy as a form of communication as researched on by Bevan. People get jealous for various reasons but the most important thing to note is that jealousy is communicated to the other person in actual words or in actions. Hence the need for reading verbal cues together with non-verbal cues to better explain what is going on and identify the root of the problem.
Communication is necessary in literally every aspect of our lives and in order to preserve sanity and maintain order then one has to effectively communicate with each other. Effective communication is done as per the principles of effective communication and should be looked at keenly. Communication is not just communication but should be effective communication.
References
Bevan, J. L. (2013). The communication of jealousy. New York, NY: Peter Lang.
Gamble, T. K., & Gamble, M. (2016). Nonverbal Messages Tell More: A Practical Guide to Nonverbal Communication. Routledge.