Life is as simple as these three questions: What do I want? Why do I want it? And how will I achieve it?”
― Shannon L. Alder
At least, Shannon tried to explain life in three questions, but is this all? Well, life is a mystery. Solving it is a puzzle. We rely on time to slowly unfold to us the future. But,,,,, should it be like this really? Do we have the power to control whatever happens in our lives? Or should we just go with the flow?
These are a few questions we ask ourselves and finding the answer is another series of questions. So we are fighting a battle that seems to be endless.
Good news! There is something you can do, and it begins with asking ourselves the right questions. The answers to such questions can take you through the turbulent of life, shape, and change our view of life.
Take a moment and ask yourself the following questions.
1) Am I using my time wisely?
Let’s take the example of John, who is a university professor. He is diagnosed with cancer and given five years to live.
He devises a plan for the next five years to achieve whatever he wanted. Every second counts and he must make something great out of it. He plans for his kids to secure them a future. So he works three times harder.
Within three years, he has amassed a recognizable amount of wealth. He has bought numerous houses and put them under his children. He has opened his wife a big business and put enough money in her bank account to sustain the business for the next three years.
What do you learn from John? This is a guy that understands the value of time. He doesn’t want to waste even a second. The results are not shocking; the reward of his hard work is evident.
Now, you don’t have to be like John. You don’t need a negative force, pushing itself down your throat to understand the importance of time.
Anyone who does not manage his/her time is like a captain without a compass. Before they find the right direction, they’ve wasted a lot of time trying every way. And in most instances, they never find it at all.
Time is a crucial aspect of life. In fact, life is time. If you live for eighty years, that’s your time you were predestined. Whatever you do with, it matters a lot.
Everyone has the same amount of time – 24 hours. We don’t have a particular group of people that have more than 24 hours in a day (unless they come from Pluto). What does it mean; everyone is accountable for every minute they spend.
2) How can I let go something that’s holding me back?
Anytime you give up something, you create room for something better. In late December and January of every year, we jolt down New Year resolutions. We put down what level of career we want to achieve on that year, building homes, getting new jobs and more. They are vast.
We are psyched up when we come across the morning shows with psychologists, and counsellors with useful advice to help us make resolutions. At this time, every advice comes on a golden platter. We are so excited and are confident that this time you must get it right.
When we set the ball rolling, we begin hitting the rocks. The opposition we meet first is just the tip of the iceberg. The more we continue pressing on, the friction becomes thicker. Eventually, we give up and stay with our typical trends. Does this sound familiar?
Now setting foot on new land is not a walk in the park. It’s common to face opposition. But our strategies and resilience create the difference. New studies show that only 8% of those that want to make a change succeed. Isn’t that shocking?
Creating a difference should not target the results you want to achieve, but the steps you will take.
· Targeting the evil King, Not his evil Soldiers
Let’s take an example of two people, Ashley and Nicole who are weighing 180 pounds each. Their target is to lose 80 pounds in six months. Both have set down some plans and hope that they’ll make it.
Ashley has decided to hit the gym thrice in a week for with each session covering one hour. She has figured out that she will have lost the specified pounds even before the deadline. She has not planned on changing her diet, though.
Nicole, on the other hand, has a totally different plan. She will not be attending gym sessions like Ashley. She has planned of doing a thirty-minute aerobics from the morning show and cycles 1 km to her workplace. Plus, she has heavily invested in her diet. She’s not taking pizza, ice cream, fried, grilled food or any other junk food.
Who do you think will win the contest? You’re right, Nicole will carry the day.
Her fight is not targeting the results of bad eating habits but the habit itself. With the help of a few exercises here and there, he has the upper hand. Don’t you know that you have to pass through a few soldiers before you reach the king?
· Determine the “dangers” of giving up the Item
Anything that you want to give up has its downsides and upsides. However, in this context, the disadvantages outweigh the upsides.
Let’s slow down a bit. The downsides might be beneficial in the future. So you have to determine which one is beneficial currently and which one isn’t. If all does not work, you have no other choice but to dispose of them and welcome new options.
· The purpose of what you want to forego
It’s simple; you don’t have to mule over this. If you’re going to make a change in your life, you better make positive decisions even against your will.
Is your life better with that habit, job or relationship? Is it adding even a dime to your overall well-being? If these questions do not rhyme with your habit, you have no choice than to forego it. This is the simplest way of determining what you want and what you don’t.
3) What do you hope to achieve in life?
Yes, everyone has a plan for their life. But how sure are you that you are on the right course? This is a common question that someone might have asked. Furthermore, you always ask yourself your targets. Not many seem to milk it completely.
To get the bottom of the question, you have to dissect your life and get a more profound meaning. Let’s have a look at some tips.
· Go for what is making you happy
Your life will never be wasted if you are so glad at whatever you do. It doesn’t matter your financial situation or status in society. After all, your happiness is the root of your desires. It will speak a great deal about your productivity and success in your endeavours.
Is it travelling, staying with kids, being an entrepreneur, or the corporate world? The list is endless. After putting all your preferences together, determine which one makes you happy the most. You can now pinpoint ideas that might help you make a living from it. Trust me, you will never lack ideas.
· Being Positive is the ONLY weapon
Life is not a walk in the park. You will always have opposition. For instance, your colleagues will sometimes gang up against you, your child will sometimes go against your instructions, and you will sometimes get hurt in your marriage.
Don’t freak out when you see everything turning against you. How you respond to the situations is what determines the outcome.
· Continuously Looking for Knowledge
Knowledge is infinite. As we continue learning, we are introduced to new concepts that change the course of our life in a completely differ rent way. But does this mean that we should stop seeking knowledge? Not really, In fact, it inspires us to be more curious.
If you focus on the excitement of discovering new things, you may be treated to new ideas that help you achieve your goals. Jeff Bezos had an idea in mind that would ultimately turn how we buy things. If he hadn’t been curious enough to find a way to meet this need, we wouldn’t be having Amazon today. The company just hit its twentieth birthday four years ago, and it’s growing stronger by the day. It’s a similar scenario with Mark Zuckerberg, Bill gates and any other big names that dared to be curious.
As you seek for knowledge, keep in mind not to focus on results. It’s a stumbling block, and it will take a short time before you are pulled down. Focus on the journey and not destination.
4) How can I be of value to those around me?
Let’s face it – you never came to this world alone. You have a mother, father and siblings. Let’s remove your immediate family from the picture. You have a friend or anyone close whom you care about.
According to Psychologists, human beings are naturally social. We can’t survive without relating to other people. That’s why the harshest punishment you can ever give a culprit is to put him in prison away from the world.
The way you handle people speaks a lot about the inner you. If you say you value those around you, your thoughts and actions must show it. Let’s see what we mean.
· Investing in People
The best investment you can do is to invest in someone. It goes beyond changing their lives positively, but they’ll remember you for as long as they live.
Investing in a person does not necessarily mean that you have to give them money. Even a good piece of advice is golden. Also, if you know what they need to succeed, the resources to help them achieve their goal is a great deal.
If you notice someone with talent, make use of it and support them if you can. Don’t give the success on a silver platter but help them with a medium to reach their goals.
· Creating time for them
Yes, you might be busy, that’s why you need to create that extra time to make a call, visit them or just send a text. It might mean nothing to you, but it’s something big on their end. At least it shows you are concerned about their progress.
Also, it will give then an extra push to continue. They might have been on the verge of giving up, but your call uplifted them. It’s the easiest way of ensuring your juniors, student or anyone does not give up.
· Be prepared to let them go
A successful leader does not hold on to those he’s leading. Refusing to let one go is a characteristic of an autocratic type of leadership which is a cousin to dictatorship. Yes, it might be painful, and it seems like a hard nut to crack. However, it’s what is needed to finish the work you had begun in them.
A good leader is ready to let go smoothly. And not letting go without having natured something. Successfully doing this is a sign that you have done an excellent job, and they can make it on their own. It makes them independent and be able to make decisions without your supervision.
The good part is that as you let others go, you will receive new people. If you take them under your wings, they’ll do the same to others.
Bottom – line
Life is more than we see. For those that have seen it from that angle, they’re nailing it in their relationships, families, jobs marriages and many more. They’ve discovered the purpose of the existence and decided to follow the trail to the end.
All in all, we still have a lot of unanswered questions. But with the four we have dealt with, they’ve brought a new glimpse that we never knew before.